The art of speaking well is amongst the most prized possession that we, as humans, possess. Speaking well helps you with friendships, relationships, at home, and at work. It is not to be confined to that one special presentation, or to that one sales pitch, or that one interview. It is something that wells up and flows from deep within you- sweet, gentle & honest, and the words are of such quality that they benefit all parties involved. Is this possible? Can this be learnt? Or is this just a gift?
The answer is - it depends. We all hold the key within us to speak truthfully, honestly and clearly. Yes, a certain amount of training is very helpful in overcoming jitters, and in crafting the right language for each occasion. But the core kernel, the ability to let your thoughts be heard loud and clear, to be gentle and kind at all times in your speech, and to be, above all, honest and ethical, is within us, built into us. We have to simply open the doors and let it flow through us.
Just as a doctor, when practicing her craft properly, is simply helping the body heal itself, that same native intelligence within ourselves propels us to be a good (even great) speaker. But of course, we interfere, and do not allow this process to complete itself naturally.
This interference takes many forms:
- Identifying ourselves excessively with past successes and failures -leading to a feeling of inferiority or superiority in the present, directly impacts how well we are able to connect to our listeners. Good training schools often ask you to put yourself in the shoes of the listener. The truth is, deep down, you share more with your listeners than you might realize. So connecting well within yourself, and maintaining that connectedness, you will automatically connect with your listeners
- Worrying about the results of the speech-a sure way to failure. This is a more generic problem than simply about speaking. When we worry excessively about the future, we find ourselves missing in the here and now! For we are no longer in the present- but our body is here- and this fundamental conflict causes stress, worry, fatigue and an untold number of other problems. And if we are not present, how can we actually talk? We mumble away a few sentences, which sail right over the heads of our listeners, who are left wondering "What did he just say?"
- Fear- This is the cousin of worry, though more acute in its form. Sometimes the fear is real- in which case it is better to take action to alleviate that fear than to talk! But if the fear is imagined, as is more often the case, then step back for a moment, collect yourself, turn your attention inward and spend a minute or two within your body. Then watch as your breathing steadies itself, and slowly bring yourself out of this semi-meditative state, and begin speaking. Many great speakers practice some form of "collecting themselves" before going out to make important presentations, and this process connects them with their deeper self and gives them the grounding necessary to make a terrific speech.
ToastMasters & Others!
To get immediate help with overcoming jitters while talking in front of the public, join a ToastMasters club near you. They have an excellent informal setting where you can practice speaking to a group of folks like you, and some experts who can give pointers to you. Alternatively, a higher priced but well-received program is the Dale Carnegie method of Public Speaking. Originally founded by Dale Carnegie (by the way, whose books on public speaking and other social skills are excellent), this program takes you through a formal process of learning to become a better speaker. The money is well spent and an excellent investment in yourself (this is the type of investment we mean when we talk about having Working Capital as part of your Personal Finance). Try looking for a local chapter of this program, sometimes outsourced to other training institutions near you.
The impact of effective speaking on your career will be enormous, and you will be the chosen one for making presentations, sales pitches or even negotiations. You will rise to leadership positions in either executive or technical capacity for your ability to present complex ideas simply and lucidly. And your ability to speak honestly and ethically will bring you loyalty from the folks who work for you.
We hope you will take this skill very seriously and make this an important part of your overall plan for success.
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